Zombie Survival Rules

Good day fellow zombie fighters. I want to put the most important ideas in one post so the basics are all in one place. These are the rules that you will have to follow to stay alive. It’s going to happen some time in the near future so we have to use all the time we have to prepare for what will come. We will have a job to do and even though it is optional to everyone, if you consider that your life is on the line, you might want to participate in this battle to save the human race. Here are the most basic rules that you will need to follow.

1. Get weapons such as guns and ammunition. This is perhaps the biggest rule because without guns, you really don’t stand a chance.

2. Find shelter and protection because it's not very smart to be hiding in the open.

3. Never stop moving because the zombies will eventually find you.

4. Find as many living people as possible, even if the only person still alive is your worst enemy. Fighting zombies is a lot easier in a group.

5. And lastly, you cannot be afraid. The first thing you will need to do is overcome your fear of zombies because it will be a whole lot harder to fight zombies if you’re afraid of the disgusting creatures that they truly are.

Zombies/ 1950's Housewives

It would be easier to fight off zombies if you pretend they are all 1950's housewives. Why?First of all, most of them are considered to be brainless and that’s why they want to eat your brains. Second of all, they hunger for things that don't taste very good such as flesh and brains. And last, some of the zombies might actually be housewives from the 1950's that are coming back to life to kill the current housewives of today.

I'm not exactly saying that the zombies are going to cook and clean for you, but considering that they are entertaining to watch, they can be generally related to not only housewives from 1950, but also the housewives of today. The fact that they would make a show about housewives who can't live in the same house and yet still do is, to me, the dumbest idea. With that said, I hope you all realize how much all these pointless figures of television would be easy to kill in a fight against zombies.

Protection

Shawn of the Dead

How do we get protection from zombies while following mommy’s rule of safety first? Once the apocalypse begins the first thing you will need to do is find protection and shelter. When I say protection and shelter I don’t mean go into some creepy-ass, haunted house like some stupid teenage girl from almost every scary movie. I mean get in a car, get some sort of metal shield, and don’t go somewhere noisy because that will only attract the zombies!


You might want to call a friend and get as many un-zombified people into a group as possible because one person trying to fight off a hoarde of zombies won’t end very well. On the other hand, you must make sure that no-one you called has been bitten for if so they will turn into a zombie when you won’t even expect it and you, along with him or her, will become a zombie.

The Beginning...

The zigzagger blog has an End of the World Survival Guide with some great Zombie fighting tips.

I believe that someday there will be a zombie apocalypse.

The sky will darken, there will be a sickening smell in the air and our lungs will burn with the taste of acid. Welcome to the Zombie Apocolypse. All the graves on the planet will be awakened by the reanimating gas that will be released into our atmosphere. We will be at war with the undead...

How will we fight this war? The Zombie Apocalypse Guide to Survival (ZAGS) proposes several ways and in the coming months I will be posting ideas and plans for the survival of the human race. This will be a tough fight but with my help we’ll get through it. My instructions will be very clear and descriptive on how to re-kill a zombie.

I will be here to help you on your journey of becoming a professionally trained zombiphile expert.

ZOMBIES!!!